Well, today was alright, did some chores saw Jake for a bit :)
Just now I've been thinking about Dan though... It's hard not to most of the time, but I remembered something from our past and suddenly everything just came back. All the memories of us, our first kiss, when we went to see wild target, when we used to meet up after school in secret, when he came round mine once, all the times I've been round his, the day we were in his attic... some of the best memories I have to be honest. I don't think I'll ever regret being with Dan or feeling what I did for him, ever. I was in love with him, that's hard to let go of, and something that I can never regret. I don't know what I feel these days, some days he annoys me but inside I love it, and other days I can't stop thinking about him, us, what we had, how we used to be. That day in bugs bottom was and is one of the best memories we have in my opinion. It was a brilliant day, sky blue and the sun shining. I can never help but wonder if he ever thinks about those times or about us. I'll be honest I doubt it, but there is always that little shred of hope and excitement that I think he does. I'd ask him about it but I'm just too afraid that he'd say no and I'd just feel so embarrassed and stupid. I have no idea why I still think about him and us the way I do, I mean, we're both in pretty stable relationships right now. Agh I dunno, maybe it'll go away one day...
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