11/11/2010

So today wasn't too bad :) although, getting up majorly late wasn't the best idea ever, and having a sister that is complete arse all the time doesn't help either. Got soaked today, my stupid dolly shoes!! I asked to wear my sister's boots today and she said no, EVEN though she wasn't wearing them herself, and I haven't seen her wear them in ages. She's such a cow  ¬_¬
Had a science exam at lunch which wasn't too bad, although having a broken calculator kinda sucked. Dan seems to have backed off a bit. I think I'm happy about that, it's not that I want him out of my life completely! It's just I don't think we should be as close as we usually are, you know, with all the flirting n stuff.
Ugh, "friend" Grant today reeaallllyyyyy pissed me off today. Using my past to get at me, I could've actually killed him. Here was the conversation,
Him: "oh if you had listened to your FRIENDS then you wouldn't be even talking to Dan. But no, you never listen to us!"
Me: "Yeah well, if I HAD listened to you guys then I would've never found out for myself and would've just taken your word for it. But now that I've actually experienced being hurt by the people I've been out with then I wouldn't be who I am today."
Him: "But you NEVER listen to us!! You went out with Joe about 15 times and what good came of that? Nothing. "
Me: "Look man, we went out 12 times!!! And that was a LONG time ago alright? Can't you just let all of this go? Plus I didn't go out with ANYONE from February this year til October, and you're telling me this now. What's the point?! Can't you just leave me alone??"
Him: "No because you're stupid. You were not completely innocent during the time you were single, you were secretly with Dan. And I don't care if it was a long time ago, it still happened and you still did all those things."
Me: "Look man, I don't care about your opinion of me. What happened between  me and Dan is none of your business, plus for you information we hardly did anything, that wasn't "innocent" as you say, anyway so why are you getting pissy about it? Just leave me alone."

Jeez I could've bloody murdered that boy. Don't ask about the whole Joe thing, that really was ridiculous. And pointless. But I was right though, if I hadn't gone out with Joe or Dan or whoever else, I wouldn't be me now. Completely independent and not weak. I can take an insult but when its from a friend. that hurts. That's really what gets me, is when a friend says it, and you'd think that they'd be the understanding ones. Oh and Frances yesterday I could've killed her too!! Basically called me a slut so I cornered her and made her say sorry, I nearly cried. and she had the bloody cheek to try and get me to bunk my 5th lesson then called me boring for not doing it!! Such lovely friends I have eh? But to be honest, they have been the only ones who have stuck by me through the years and I really am grateful for that, but I don't expect them to throw my past back in my face. Taking advantage of my trust I guess. Not that I do trust them... I can't. Not anymore. They've told people things and spread things about me even though they are my friends. I have forgiven them but I still can't trust them... To be quite honest the only person I can trust is Jake (My boyfriend). And I'm not being cheesy or anything, but he really is. I've known him for most of my life and he's always been there for me, and told me everything will be alright. Honestly, don't get me wrong, I love my friends to the moon and back, but sometimes they can be such fucktards. And just plain mean... But that's what friendship is based on I guess. Haha, bitchiness and two-facedness. Fun times.
But other than the conversation with Grant and getting up late, my day was pretty good.